I just cut my nipple shaving
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
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