That's intense
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
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