Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
he puts the penis in happiness.
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
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