It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Randomize
