he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I AM VODKA MAN
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Randomize
