Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
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