pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
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