Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
