it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize