Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Randomize
