In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Randomize
