you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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