I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
We smell like vodka and hangover
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
