that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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