I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
