your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Randomize
