Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize
