Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize
