bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
pop tarts are not kleenex
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
