you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Randomize
