Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Randomize
