a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
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