If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
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