I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Randomize
