Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
