Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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