I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
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