i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
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