What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
