I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
I want to fling myself into the sun
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
