What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
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