We won't sleep together?
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Randomize
