I love black thongs
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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