we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Randomize
