Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
id be glad to
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Randomize
