at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
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