I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
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