there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize
