There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Randomize
