Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
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