I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
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