Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
i can't believe i had my finger in that
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Randomize
