Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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