it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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