office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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