Whatcha textin bout Willis?
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
Randomize
