apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
