Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Randomize
