My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
