like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Randomize
